New Doorknob

Today, instead of a general idea of Alaskan life, I would like to share with you the events of my morning. I find them both amusing and action-packed, and I hope you do too.

7:25 Alarm Clock goes off "Beep Beep Beep" We're too far from any radio station to have a choice when setting the alarm. Beep is my only choice.

7:25:03 Hit snooze for the first time. The plan is to do this until the clock says 8:00.

7:30 The phone rings. Because of a previous event involving me sleeping in, and getting a call from the school, I take morning phone calls very seriously. I jump out of bed, wrap my blankie around me, and race for the living room, where I left

 the phone the night before.

7:31 Answer the phone. It's my Dad! He wishes me a happy birthday, and we chat until it's time for me to leave for school. Unfortunately, I'm still sitting on the couch wrapped in a blanket, instead of being dressed like I could be if I had a longer phone cord on the phone. 

8:13 We hang up, and I head to my room to get dressed.

8:16 Dressed in black pants, my tie-dyed green and white school shirt, and a camouflage handkerchief, because it's Friday!  I leave my room, ready to find my shoes and go to school.

8:17 Attempt to open the door so I can leave my house. It doesn't open.

8:17-8:25 Twist, pry, shove, rattle, and curse the doorknob. It refuses to open.

8:25 Claim defeat and call the school. Floyd is very sympathetic to my cause, and informs me that he will send help. 

8:26 Move the shelves away from the window in the kitchen so I can communicate with whoever shows up to save me. 

8:27 Try to open the window. Realize it's locked, unlock the window and try again. Realize that it was unlocked in the first place, it's just frozen in place. Unlock the window for real and pull harder.

8:28 Feel pretty proud of myself for opening the window. Realize that this is the least of my problems.

8:30 Greet the principal, and both maintenance men as they troop onto my porch. Watch my principal fiddle with the door for a minute, decide it needs the attention of the maintenance men, and leaves. 

8:32 Talk to the men as they work on the door. Go screw the doorknob in

 tightly, hoping that will help. Try to take the screen off the window so I can pass them my keys.

8:33 Realize the screen is also frozen in place. Watch Warren hit it with his Leatherman, breaking up the ice, while John works on the doorknob.

8:34 Listen as the maintenance men decide that taking the doorknob off is the best bet. 

8:35 Try to unscrew the doorknob from the inside while John twists and wrenches it from the outside.  Curse John for trying to pinch my fingers. Realize that the

doorknob is completely unscrewed, but still won't move. 

8:36 Return to the window, where the screen is mostly free. Use the screwdriver my dad gave me to pry it the rest of the way out. Silently thank Dad for getting me tools. 

8:37 Get a chair John can use to land on when he comes through the window.

8:38 Watch John break the doorknob, twice. 

8:39 Race to school, feel guilty about how late I am. Watch how no one seems to care.

8:45 Start school like a regular day!!

10:00 Receive new key for the new doorknob the maintenance guys are putting in. Wonder just how cold it's going to be in my house with the front door open for an hour.